what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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