Sponge bath it is.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
a search helicopter?!
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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