Her vagina should come with caution tape.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
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i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize