Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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