Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
