We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize