Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
whose parrot is this?
Randomize
