sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
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I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
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My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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