finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Alive.
So much puke
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
