Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
