It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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