Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Randomize
