You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
