Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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