Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
this will be a night to untag.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Randomize
