jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
meet me or not, i'm out of control
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
