walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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