the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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