Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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