Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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