i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
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I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
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So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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