i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
