i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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