My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
