He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
