Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
