I wish i was in the wii world.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
the night ended with taco bell and tears
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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