I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
