Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
