Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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