Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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