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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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