You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Randomize
