literally had 100 drinks last night.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
