I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I don't think brook has ever known best
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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