Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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