I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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