like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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