How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Randomize
