happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
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