I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I would fuck him just for his dog
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
