you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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