Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
