Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
