I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Naked Twister starts at high noon
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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