id be glad to
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
i out mim tonsoeep
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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