i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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