It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I wish i was in the wii world.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again