Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
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