These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize