in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
