i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
